Description
🎁 “One Card to Fool Them All”
(Single. Vertical. Bare-Minimum Effort, Maximum Judgement.)
Description:
Need to look thoughtful without actually being thoughtful? Boom—this card’s got you. Whether it’s a birthday, holiday, or just another Tuesday where you forgot until five minutes ago, this beautifully smug card screams, “Look! I did a thing!” without you having to try too hard.
Made with pretentiously premium 270gsm white paper (because anything flimsier would match your emotional availability), this card oozes quality, sarcasm, and style. The vibrant design? Eye-searingly fabulous. The finish? Smooth enough to distract from your questionable life choices. And yes, it’s vertical—because horizontal is for people who plan ahead.
What You Actually Get:
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1 vertical greeting card (because clearly 2 would be too generous)
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Size: The universal “it’ll do” dimension
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Paper: 270gsm premium white paper, classy AF
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Finish: Professionally done—unlike that last project you bailed on
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1 envelope, included for free (you’re welcome)
Care Instructions:
Gently wipe off dust with a clean, dry cloth—preferably while rolling your eyes and muttering, “Why do I even bother?”
